MLS Week 2 Predictions (Thursday Games)

You didn't believe in my powers last week, did you?
Now look at you.  $600 in the hole to a dude from Bayonne nammed Bobby the Chin.
NEVER DOUBT ME AGAIN!!!

Now...

Let's move on to Week 2.  I'll save weekend games for another day, but allow me to stun you once again with my incredible prognostication skills skillz for the two Thursday night games:

Houston 1-2 Real Salt Lake:  Ba-da-ding-ding-ding-ding-WHOOOOAAAAAAAAHHHHH.  I hate you, Beckerman.  Ras Kyle will be beaten senseless by a furious Jamaican immediately after kickoff.  I will then recline my seat...sip my tea...and chuckle.

LA Galaxy 3-1  Chivas USA:  I have contacted the Chivas front office, and I can confirm that if the Goats lose this game, the Galaxy will tear up their lease and force the team to merge with DC to form the new St. Louis Utd.