Hipster Runoff: The Emergence of the USA Bro

HRO's Crls examines the rabid US Soccer fan through the "alternative" pop culture lens.
Right on that line of "funny because it's true" and "sad because its true".
Good stuff.

Random Thoughts #13: My Cache Is Full

Good afternoon, peoples.
Believe it or not, I have a day job, and by some shitty stroke of corporate luck, I'm kinda busy today.  But I will be doing my usual internet bottom-feeding later tonight.

BUT...
If there was ever a sign that I was a bit overloaded on soccer/music/pop culture internetification, this could be it:  This morning I woke up during one of those hazy half-awake dreams.  In this dream, I was surfin' the net (as it were), and read a headline on some site that said "NY signs Grizzly Bear and old Mexi-alt bro as DPs".  I kid you not.

It's alllll starting to merge into one big KFC Famous Bowl of random shit, my friends.

Kele Okereke: I Am Koko

(Image via The Mirror)

FYI, the (former?) Bloc Party frontman has started a blog.

FF&SS vs. Twitter

I've been getting e-mails this week about folks wanting to follow me on Twitter...
I don't know how that's happening...
I do not have a Twitter account, nor do I intend to start one.  Not sure what suddenly changed that made folks think otherwise, and I'm not Twitter savvy enough to find out.

Fact is, between this here blog, and my Facebook page (I acknowledge the ridiculousness of my own status updates), I run my internet mouth MORE than enough.
God only knows the nonsense I'd spew on Twitter...so no thank you.

So, in a more cohesive summary:
 - I am NOT on Twitter, nor do I intend to be.
 - I AM on the Book of Faces where my personal nonsense factor goes even beyond this site.

NOW...lunch break.
In the words of Al Gore, "Peace out y'all"!!

Lamebook.com? Okay. I'll bite.

I know posting this will send the Post-Ironic Police* straight to my cubicle,
but I don't give a damn.  Funny is funny.
And Lamebook is funny.

* and that phrase immediately allerted the Post-Modern Patrol**

**and that phrase lead me to kick my own ass in the break room.

Enjoy some samples below . . .

Reason #3049 Why The Internet Is Entertaining

(Image via MetroFanatic)

Where else but The Book would you see the following:
"Jozy Altidore is now friends with Markus Schopp"?
I love you, internet.

Finnally a 'Bloggable' Take On T. Woody

(Get it?!  HAAAAA!!!)

As the Regional Vice President for the National Society for Minding My Own Fucking Business, and it's sister group, The American Association of Star-Worship Is For Children and the Idiotic, the whole Tiger Woods things what a big "whatevs, man" for me . . .BUT people's reaction plays right into my obsession with pop culture and constant desire to have everyone on the planet figured out . . .SO, the aftermath has been very insightful, and pretty entertaining.

What's VERY entertaining (and intentionally unintentional in its insight) is Hipster Runoff's take on the whole sitch.  NOTE:  If you're not familiar with Carles' stuff, you have to read it understanding it's done from the point of view from a sort of composite "character" of youth/ignorance/cool.*

* I hate that last paragraph...but I have no idea how to fix it.  There's reason why I bang out all these words on a Blogspot account and not someplace legit.

A Brief Memo to The Internet

Dear Purveyors of "New Media",

Nothing any of us ever do/say/write/etc in our poorly composed 3-paragraph ego-fests is even REMOTELY important by any worthwhile standard.  Begin taking yourself 90% less seriously immediately.

Thank You,
 - FF&SS, Inc.

Fancy Expansion...All up in Your Facebook.

This is a strangely proud moment for me.

Inspired by the Facebook fanciness of the boys at The Original Winger, I went and clicked a whole bunch of shit, and did some techno stuff that I don't really understand . . .the end result is this:

Faux Fur & Soccer Shirts has a Facebook page!!!

YEAH!  I've finally caught up to 2007!

So please (no, I'm not beyond begging...at all), hook a brotha up and show me some digital love.  I have a real urge to do something "greater" with this tiny blog, and this could be step one . . .who knows, right?

Facebook!  YAEAH . . .I mean, YEAH!

Hipster Runoff

Mr. Francis hipped me to Hipster Runoff a few weekends ago (I'm mad late for something like this, right?!  You'd think this was my homepage), and I've been reading it non-stop ever since.  By far the most entertaining thing on the webz...assuming you get the "joke" and don't might looking in a mirror and feeling like a jackass every now and then.

If you either are, think you might be, are terrified that you might be, are secretly hoping someone thinks you are, have close personal ties with, or just generally hate/love hipsters, this shit will kill you at least 3 times a day.  If Carles was a real person, I don't know if I'd want to hang out with him (drinking Schaefer because it's more "authentic" than Pabst), or hold a prayer vigil with his mother for the sake of his soul.

I Done Done It.

It appears that the folks at Da Book (not to be confused with Da Space) have wised up and let us add user/screen names for easy-to-find URLs and whatnot.

Here I am: Facebook.com/FauxFurAndSoccerShirts
"I looooove technologyyyyyyyyy"!

To be honest, I'm still a very cranky old man when it comes to social networking, but whatevs. It seems that if I don't participate at a level higher than I do presently, my name will go unwhispered in the halls of time (what?) and I'll be rendered socially impotent. Can't have that, can we?

(That said...I'll be damned if I sign up for Twitter. That's some next level panic attack shit, right there.)

Celebrate Your Inner Hipster

Let me preface this by saying that I am NOT an anti-hipster guy. In fact, I have been labeled as such on more than a few occasions (unless you write for the NY Times, In which case, I'm a "blipster").

Hipsters make the world more colorful, and give everyone what they seem to love most in this modern age . . .something to complain about. Hipsters are like spiders: gross, creepy and generally not welcome by the masses...but without them, alot of the other insects you hate would be a much bigger problem in your lives. Without hipseters, your favorite dive bar would have closed years ago, same for that quirky "boutique" you buy your clothes in. Without hipsters, the music scene would be dull, Bud Light would be the only thing on tap, the internet would crawl to a stand-still, and Nickelback would be on-par with the Beatles.

Why am I even typing this? If you're a regular reader to this blog...guess what? Someone has probably called you a hipster behind your back in the last month.

Anyway, the point of all this is a pretty funny site I saw called Look At This Fucking Hipster. I'm sure it was intended to make fun of a certain type of person...but efph that noise. Look at it as a celebration of your own (sometimes abrasive) uniqueness and free spirit. If you can't laugh at yourself...then what's the point of it all, right?

The Greatest Story EVER Told

I owe you all a HUGE apology . . .I meant to share this with you last week.

One of the bloggers over at JumpTheTurnstyle.com posted a story that takes comedy, random circumstance and generally bizarre shit to a ho'...nuvva...level. For real, until you read this (very long) story, your life just isn't complete.

Stop what you're doing. Print that shit out, and go read it in one of the stalls at your job.

I Am The Newest Member Of Daft Punk . . .Care to join?

Thank you, JTTS!

Hold my calls for the rest of the weekend . . .this is how I will be spending it.
First is the keyboard-based player that lets you mix and mash the vocal bits from "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger". Second, and even more time consuming is the keypad drum machine.

I am in heaven, and will be getting NOTHING done today.
I got dem beatz!!

Ms. Martinez

'break or complete you' from ms.martinez on Vimeo.

Wow.
Is is possible to be sexier than that?

I say no.
Be sure to check out her other videos, with sounds by Kings of Leon and Chester French.

[Also, I'd like to congratulate Ms. Martinez on inspiring a new blog label: "Wiminz".]

"Best Of" Re-Post!

As a final and fitting "tribute" to 2008 (a year when nothing was new, and everything was just a re-packaged version of something else), I present to you, my anti-Grammy post re-gifted as a Best of 2008 list!

Enjoy!

[FACT: Everyone loves these lists, despite that fact that everyone bitches about them. Don't believe me? Take a look at Stereogum's "50 Most Discussed Posts" for 2008. That's right, the most popular story on the most popular "cool guy" music website is a year-end list about other sites' year-end lists. I. Love. The Internet.]

Thundercats Trailer

Whoever made this deserves to be elected President of a small country.

Boondocks Bootleg

In an interview on Okayplayer, Boondocks creator, Aaron McGruder talks about his newest project...a live-action sketch series. Imagine Boondocks without the filter of TV execs. Yeah.

You can check it at boondocksbootleg.com . . .or better yet, hit up the YouTube channel.

No idea how to title this . . .

I love the internet.

Blackwolf Meets Lordi

Here's your daily dose of the surreal.

I'm sure you remember dragon master and NYC's unofficial wizard, Blackwolf (yes, he really does walk around the City in character...assuming it is just a character . . .as this point, I just might believe that he's a 400yr old wizard, bcause, hell...what isn't possible?!). Well . . .he's still in touch with Triumph, and recently had the chance to make his dream come true and meet his favorite band, Lordi.

Shit like this can't be made up. Check it out for yourself.

Me? Oh, yes, I have set myself on fire once again. The world is insane. These dudes actually exist. It's time to panic.